Shopping for meaning in life???

Like most girls, I love shopping!!! Especially when it comes to bags... I have a weakness for beautiful bags... I love pretty shoes too, those at least 3 inches high heels or boots but there's some shoes I will always get blisters after wearing it even when the shoes are seasoned... Haven't been buying shoes lately because seeing the stack on shoe boxes at home and the rate I am changing shoes, I decided to stop buying shoes. I have so many pairs of shoes and boots which I hardly wear... No chance to wear... Sigh...

Wearing clothes is purely on mood... I hardly buy clothes because I realised the type of clothes I like and fits me is very limited... Buying cosmetics and facial products is when I need them... Unlike most girls, I do not stock up a lot of different types of cosmetics. Maybe it's because I seldom make up now...

Right now, I wish there is a shopping mall which I can shop for meaning in life... Or maybe an aim in life... After living for more than 26 years, till now, I have no idea what I really want in life... I pass through everyday thinking about the same question but having the same routine day after day... And I hate it!!!

I wish for something more fun, interesting and challenging and most importantly, motivation and simple-minded... I am the type who will be killed in a world of politics. I often wonder to myself, why am I working so miserably and having no directions in life?? And I always come to the same conclusion... I work because of money... Money to pay my debts and help out in family... But I do not earn a lot too!!! After paying off everything, I hardly have any money left... So how do I managed to own those expensive bags?? Some are from my bf, and others, I save up for them...

I really hope for somewhere or something which gives me the motivation and push in life but have yet to find anything... Going to work everyday gives no meaning in life... I am like being forced to do everything I am doing now, work and others... How come some people seems to enjoy their life so much when I feel like I am suffering as the day passes?? What is it that I lack??? What is it that give them the energy that seems to be never-ending??

Am I in the right place now?? Where can I go to shop for in order to get the motivation, drive, meaning, aim in life???